Bubble Wrap
by lordjohnford
Summary: Eagle thinks Alex gets hurt too often. Lion agrees. Armed with bubble wrap and duct tape, they take matter into their own hands. One-shot.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Alex Rider or any associated characters.**

 **Dedicated to my crazy and wonderful friends, who I have a feeling would probably attempt something like this at a sleepover… please don't.**

 **Enjoy!**

It had a been a fairly quiet day at Brecon Beacons, a for sure sign something was going to happen.

Alex and Ben had been sent back to Brecon Beacons for PT and refresher training, respectively. Alex, who had been ordered to take it easy, was currently sleeping in K-Unit's cabin, while said unit and Ben sat in the respective lectures; first aid, weapons, communications, navigation. They had escorted Alex to the cabin, following his near face plant after running the assault course, with a promise to get him for dinner. Alex had readily agreed, wanting nothing more than to nap and eat later.

Eagle sat, fidgeting in his seat, waiting for their lecturer to show. Lion, L-Unit's sharpshooter and weapons man, had settled beside him and was currently cracking his knuckles and various other joints. Twenty minutes into their sixty minute lecture, Sergeant Miller walked in. Declaring that their lecturer was in the infirmary with the flu and should they want the next forty minutes free, they should scram. There were no complaints as fifteen men scarpered from the hut. On the way out, Eagle snagged Lion.

"Hey Lion, I have a plan." Lion, interest peaked, looked towards Eagle.

"Which is?"

"You know the way Cub's always getting hurt…"

And so, Eagle spilled his planned to Lion. Two minutes later, the pair split. Lion to get bubble wrap and Eagle to get duct tape.

Ten minutes later, they meet up outside K-Unit's hut. Its resident completely unaware as to what was to come. Nodding, Eagle eased open the door and the pair entered. They were half way across the cabin, when Alex shifted slightly. They froze, breathing a sigh of relief when Alex remained in the land of counting sheep. Finishing their trek, Eagle and Lion stood on other side of the bed. Grateful that the painkillers Alex was on kept him knocked out for a good hour, the pair set to work.

Twenty minutes later, the pair stood back to admired their work. Satisfied, they initiated the second part of the plan. Tearing the cabin apart, they successfully found Ben's, Snake's and Wolf's Swiss army knives. Lion took them and ran to his cabin where he hid them under his bunk. Plan complete, Eagle plonked himself down on the floor beside the teen's bunk, absentmindedly popping the small bubbles.

Fifteen or so minutes later and Lion had yet to return. Eagle sat, pondering the whereabouts of his partner in crime, when he heard two distinct voices outside. Scottish and Liverpudlian accents made there way through the door and into the cabin. The door opened and the voices stopped. Eagle stood and met his friends' gazes. He waved wildly, a huge grin spread across his face.

"Eagle, what in the name of Lucifer did you do to my ward?" Ben asked, disbelief colouring his tone and expression. Alex lay, still asleep, on his his bunk… wrapped in bubble wrap and duct tape.

"Protecting him. He gets hurt far too often."

"So you wrapped him in bubble wrap?" Snake asked slowly, needing clarification of the sight before him. Eagle nodded proudly. Just then, Lion reappeared.

"Oh, hey-" Lion stopped mid sentence as a series of small pops filled the room.

"What the-" Alex had woken, and gone to stretch, only succeeding in sending himself over the edge of the bunk. Eagle rushed round the bunk, as the other men rushed forward.

"HA! It worked!" Eagle and Lion high-fived each other.

"You did this?!" Alex, now fully awoken from his drug induced sleep, seethed. Eagle ,once again, nodded proudly, Lion doing the same.

"Ben get me out of this!" Alex cried, not caring he used the man's real name. Ben and Snake both simultaneously started patting down their various pockets looking for the pocket knives. Not finding them, they tried their bags. Eagle had sat himself on the floor, and began petting Alex's hair, shushing his indignant cries.

Meanwhile, in the mess, Wolf and Cheetah sat at their table waiting on their remaining unit mates to show. A few minutes later, L-Unit joined them.  
"Hey Lynx, where's Lion?"  
"We figured he was already here." A few seconds later, several curses rang out through the mess hall. Two of the camps most notorious trouble makers were missing. Not good.

Sergeant Miller, surveyed the mess hall. He was about to get his own meal, when he noticed two of his units missing. Sighing, he set off to find and yell at them.

Simultaneously, Ben and Snake were tearing their bags apart looking for their Swiss knives, but to no avail.

"For god sakes, Eagle, just cut him free. We're going to miss dinner, at this rate."

There was a thundering of boots, as Wolf, Cheetah, Lynx, Cobra and Hawk ran into the cabin.

"What the bloody hell is going on?"

"Eagle cocooned me in bubble wrap and duct tape." Alex yelled, just as Miller came into the cabin. The men froze. Miller surveyed the scene in front of him.

"I don't get paid enough for this." Turning on his heel, he walked back out. He'd heard the Caribbean was especially nice this time of year.

Wolf, much like Snake and Ben, patted down his pockets. Muttering obscenities when he came up empty. He made his way over to his pack, but Cheetah stopped him.

"Don't bother, I have mine." Cheetah pulled a small, matt black multi-tool from his pocket. Wolf took the proffered item.

"C'mon, Eagle, just cut Cub free, and this can all be over with." Wolf tried. But, alas, Eagle adamantly shook his head 'no', arms folded, looking much like a petulant child. With a sigh, Wolf nodded. Simultaneously and without warning, Snake and Ben tackled Eagle, whilst Lynx and Cobra tackled Lion. hawk, with his own knife, helped Wolf to slice through the tape and bubble wrap, Cheetah pulling it back. Five minutes later, a murderous Alex was free.

The next day at breakfast, it was announced, much to the confusion of all but eight men and a teen, that all bubble wrap and duct tape was banned and that Sergeant Miller had put in for early retirement.


End file.
